The bitch in apartment 203. 

Zoe, is a beautiful, big brown eyed, orange roan cocker spaniel. In all her 5 years of existence she has never once obeyed anyone. She does as she pleases and what she wants. 

This story goes back 5 years when a 45 day old Zoe also then knows as zo monster ( you will soon find out why) bullied 2 fully grown adults into letting her sleep in thier beds. I say bullied because while there were a lot of puppy dog eyes, she mostly just bit us if we tried to get her off the bed. Those tiny sharp teeth….

We tried for years to toilet train her  but she insisted on peeing on the first stair of the staircase. This yellow river haunted many a maid. One fine morning, she stopped. She chose the downstairs bathroom as her spot and toilet trained herself to pee on the drain hole. It was beautiful. I know not how she learnt this or what triggers it to this day. 

Unlike most dogs that like being coddled and petted, Zoe will only ever lie down for a belly rub when she wants one. She spends her days staring out the balcony thinking and dreaming for hours. You can throw any amount of balls, squeakers and treats at her but she will not yield. She will not let you touch her paws or carry her ( trust me you can’t resist the urge to) and like any self respecting lady, she will hurt you if you try to grab her from behind.

She’s curious so when she’s walking down the street, she will stop and sniff other dogs. Only, the other dog will not get the same opportunity. The moment that mutt tries to sniff her back, a nightmare unfolds. There’s a lot of air biting and growling that sends some very large dogs running, with their tails between their legs. 

In the dog world, this 10kg cocker, is an alpha. She makes no attempt to hide it and she does not have friends, just subjects. I have watched for years as she comfortably establishes  an alpha position with dogs twice her size. They will learn to leave her be and they will bark when she barks. She will also sit on a chair at the vet,this cracks me up every time.

Yet this gorgeous blonde makes one hell of a companion. Our relationship is based on her never giving me what I want but always stepping up when I need something from her. Today I’ll only share one instance of this. 

I recently adopted a 2 year old golden retriever, Thalia, who is scared of the wind and trees and sounds and basically everything. She’s a goofball who loves to play. While Zoe has never been comfortable with other dogs, I witnessed an amazing few months of her stepping up to make room for Thalia. It’s an odd bond. She refuses to play any game that Thalia initiates and will not let her sit next to her. However, she will stand on two legs and lick her when she gets vaccinated. Share all her toys and food. Smack her in face when she feels like and every once in a while I catch her cuddling up next to her after she’s asleep. I was warned by several people that this was a bad idea but it’s worked out fantastically.

She’s a peculiar little creature, my Zo monster. 


Quarter Life Crisis!

So I turned 25 this year. Just like every other girl in any universe, I panicked about it since 2014 hit the calendars. Of-course finding 3!!! grey hair  did not make it any easier. So I did what any self respecting drama queen would do.. made resolutions! Never mind what they were! The only significant change I made this year was Zumba!

It’s a high intensity dance work out, well it’s supposed to be. Most of the class is just moving around in the most awkward poses while trying to avoid looking at themselves in the mirror. All the time wondering, how the hell does the instructor not have a single layer of fat in his body!

Wondering if it works? Absolutely, some people in my class have actually lost a lot of weight and either way , its the most fun you’ll have working out. Almost makes the aches and being crammed in a sweaty room for an hour worth it.

So why is 25 such a crazy year? It’s when shit hits the fan! Let’s face it, given our lifestyles, “ain’t none of us gonna live till a 100!” So you’ve lived more than a quarter of your life. You validate your choices and count your achievements , think about where you’re headed. All that crap you would normally do after about 5 drinks too many. Only you’re sober and will not fall asleep any minute or forget about it in the morning!

Then there is the big elephant in the room at every family gathering, the “M” word. The big “settle” as the Indian moms call it. If none of that was bad enough, facebook will constantly remind you of ridiculous crap like “25 women under 25 to watch out for” or “things every 25 year old should have experienced”. Pay no heed to them, they’re all unrealistic expectations that obviously drive better traffic to websites with quizzes like “what color are you?”

So yes, should this be a point to make those changes that will help you get to your end goals? Definitely.  I would say you’re not in the worst place if you’ve:

a. Stopped abusing and overusing hash tags (#ihavenoideawhatthepurposeofahashtagisanduseitanyway)

b. Learned that hangovers are real and shots are stupid

c. Reduced your circle of friends to people you can actually tolerate

d. Learnt to make a decent meal

e. Use sick leaves for what they are meant for

f . Found common ground with your folks

g. Stopped cussing like your life depended on it

h. and have a plan!

Should it be a year to be down in the dumps if you haven’t ? Absolutely not! Because don’t forget 26 is coming for you!